Thursday, May 24, 2012

Excuse Me?

Do you have phone etiquette?  Yes?  Well I’m glad you do because there are other people who need to learn it.  I’ve had my fair share of buttholic (butt-hole-ick; yep I just made up my own word) people who don’t know how to act when on the phone especially when they are the ones who called me.  People without phone etiquette annoy the crap out of me.  

A couple of days of days ago the phone rang and I answered...

“Hello?” I said.

“Who dis?”  said the mysterious caller.

Now I have to tell you that I was having a pretty good day so I didn't rip this guy a new one but I did have some attitude.  But if I was having a crappy day the conversation would have proceeded like this…

Me: “Who dis?  No, No, No.  Eh, you no call me and tell me ‘who dis’.  Who da hell are you?  You called me!  You no call somebody and say ‘who dis’.  What da hell is the wrong witchu (with you)?!”  “So who is dis and who you looking for?”

The caller: “Oh yeah yeah sorry yeah.  Um, yeah dis is Jack the Crack and yeah dis numba had show up on my phone and yeah I was jus wondering…who dis.”

Me: “There you go with your ‘who dis’ again.  You could have just said from the very beginning who you were and why you were calling; not just ‘who dis’.  Learn how fo ack when you call somebody! (translates to learn how to act when you call somebody!)

Yep, there I am in all my “tita moke” glory.  What’s a “tita moke’ you ask?  

I’m not proud when I act like that but push me to that place and I’ll rip you a new one.  

Anyhoo, back to the mysterious caller from a couple of days ago…I showed him some mercy only because I’ve been noticing that all the people who call with no phone etiquette are calling for the Mister.  And I don’t want them to rag on him about how much of a witch I am.  So here was my nice version of the conversation…

Me: “Hello?”
Caller: “Who dis?”
Me: “This is Jenn and who is this?”
Caller: “Oh somebody went call my numba and I wanted fo no who dis?”
Me: “And you are?”


Me: “Hello?  Maybe you know Kawai (the Mister) and if so he ain’t home.”
Caller: “Oh yeah yeah!  Oh dis Dexta (Dexter); tell him fo call me ah?!”
Me: “Okay then!”

Consider yourself lucky “Dexta”!  And by the way…learn some phone etiquette!

There you go my friends, one of my biggest pet peeves but I’m learning to brush it off and let it go.  But do you know what I mean?!?  Tell me that wouldn’t annoy you guys!  

Hope your Thursday is grand!

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

The Best Present Ever!

Has anyone talked to a tree before?  Talked, prayed, or begged to a tree?  No?  I have.  But before you go thinking that I’m some kind of lunatic, hear me out.  

Before Lychee season started I talked, prayed, and finally begged our tree to please give us some fruit this year.  I’ve lived here for 7 years and our tree gave fruit only once.

So the season came and I got nothing, nada, zilch….sad, sad face.  I thought that maybe the grocery would have some.  Nope.  Then I thought that I would go to the farmer’s market.  They would definitely have some.  But I never made it there.

Everywhere I drove, I would see trees with uka-piles of fruit on them.  There are trees everywhere I turn and I have to say I was jealous.  Every time we drove somewhere Lychee would be the topic of the whole drive.  

I would constantly tell the Mister that my mouth was watering just by looking at them.  I just had to satisfy my craving for this juicy yummy-ness.  I saw a tree that was low enough for me to pick some.  I wanted so badly for him to pull over just so I could pick one or maybe two or maybe a handful.  But that didn’t happen.  

Thoughts of being a night ninja crossed my mind.  Dress in all black and when night fell I would steal from the Lychee rich to give to the Lychee poor.  Hey, it could happen!  

I finally came to terms that I wouldn’t be consuming the juicy yummy-ness this year and I’ll just have to wait until next year.  Hmph.  

Anyhoo, last week the Mister came home from work and said he had a surprise for me.  And since he doesn’t listen to me 90% of the time, I was thinking it was a bottle of wine, pizza, or a canned Mt. Dew…you know, the usual.  

But alas, the Mister really does listen to me!  The surprise was a bag of Lychee.  Oh thank, thank you, THANK YOU!!!  I was in heaven.  And I was like a little kid..."it's mine, it's MINE and I'm not sharing!"  

I’m trying my hardest to conserve the goods but it’s oh so good.  Is it horrible of me to not share the goodness with the Radicals?  Haha, I eat them in hiding so they don’t see me.  I always share my food with them but this?  Sorry guys.  In this case, “sharing is caring” does not apply.  This is for me and only me.  Horrible right?  Okay, now I feel bad so maybe I’ll give them one each.  Just one.  

I hope everyone is having a great day!  

Thursday, May 17, 2012

I have friends; the dentist is not one of them.

Hello again!  On top of my emotions and the craziness that went on for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been having some massive blog-farts!  Haha!  Anyway, I’m slowly getting back into the blogging groove. 

On Monday, I was scheduled for a tooth extraction.  Or you can say I had a tooth pulled, for a not so glamorous term.  Tooth extraction, pulled tooth, pulling teeth…same thing. 

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Let’s start from Sunday, the day of my last meal.  I was told that I wasn’t allowed to eat or drink ANYTHING 8 hours prior to my appointment.  I no joke ate like I was never going to eat again.  I was fine and stuffed from all the food and junk I ate until Monday morning rolled around. 

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I, the person who has to have her coffee or else all hell will break loose, couldn’t have it.  Not even the tiniest drop to tickle my taste buds.  I wasn’t a happy camper.  My appointment wasn’t until 10am so I tried my hardest to keep myself busy until it was time to go. 

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I finally made it there and the receptionist informed me that they were running 20 minutes behind.  I could feel myself getting hot but I didn’t take out my no-coffee-having frustrations on her.  Lucky girl.  So I sat and waited and I gotta tell you, I felt like this dentist office was torturing me.  I was already irate at the fact that I couldn’t have my morning usual and they had an area set up with coffee and water right in front of me.  It was torture.  I could have punched the guy sitting next to me.  But I didn’t.  I kept my cool as I watched all these people make their drinks and sip them in pleasure. 

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Half an hour, which seemed like a lifetime, went by only for the receptionist to tell me “I’m really sorry but it’s going to be another 20 minutes.”  Is she provoking me to reach out and touch her?  I was all sorts of annoyed that morning.  I’m not fond of admitting that but it’s the truth. 

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“Jennifer?” said the nurse.  That’s me, that’s me!!  I couldn’t be any happier that I was closer to making this torture stop.  I went in, sat on the chair, and waited for the dentist to come in.  I don’t have any issues with pulling teeth or having my teeth drilled but what happened next is what I had an issue with.  While they were attaching me to a machine, they explained that they will put me to sleep for this procedure?  What the what?  Can’t you just numb my mouth, pull my tooth, and call it a day?  I know, what a wimp. 

So as the dentist is injecting me with this evil stuff, he tells me “You’re going to start feeling dizzy and sleepy soon!”  He wasn’t even done injecting the stuff and I was feeling it.  I don’t remember anything about the procedure but when I came to, I felt like I was in the twilight zone.  I could hear voices.  They sounded far away but when I finally tried to focus, it was the nurse sitting next to me.  Really creepy I tell you.  It was a weird and scary experience.  It was like one of those movies where it’s dark and there’s a consistent light flashing.  I didn’t feel like I had control of myself.  I felt drunk and embarrassed that I couldn’t talk normal.  The nurse walked me to my car which was even more embarrassing because I couldn’t walk straight! 

The Mister was getting a kick out of it.  He thought I was hilarious when I told him we needed to go to Wal-Mart to get my wine.  All this and all I could focus on was wine.  Now you know my priorities….I kid! 

Anyhoo, that was my horrible experience with being sedated and I do not, I repeat DO NOT, ever want to go through that again.  It’s been 3 days and I’m ready to eat something other than mashed potatoes and tomato soup.  It’s been fun but I’ll be fine without you for the rest of the year. 

So how’s about you guys?  Any weird or traumatizing experiences at the dentist?  Do share! 

Until then,

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Project: The Radicals' Room

Happy Wednesday!  I hope your week is going great!  So, I’m finally posting about the project that had me SO excited but then reality hit and well, I’m not SO excited anymore. 

Let’s do a little recap first, shall we?  Remember my complicated living situation?  I mentioned that the house we live in belongs to the Mister’s mom and we’re taking care of it until she decides to come back.  I also mentioned that the Radicals don’t have a room of their very own because all the other rooms are taken.  And that means they sleep in my room and I secretly thought that this would be the set up until they were teenagers.  Ugh. 

Anyway, while the Mister’s mom was home for Merrie Monarch week she told me she had a project for me to do and to start on it when I had time.  I immediately thought what more is there to do?  I already cleaned and re-organized the entire house.  Well, she gave me the green light to move all of her stuff in her room to the upstairs room.  And I can make her room the Radicals’ room.  What?!  Really?!  This is the room I’m working with…

I moved all of her stuff upstairs and started to move some of the Radicals’ things in there. 

**side note: I thought I took pictures of the room when it was empty but I’m not finding them. 

Anyway, the Radicals were pumped.  I was pumped.  Until…night time came and Radical #1 asked me if he could sleep in his room.  And that’s when reality set in.  I realized that I wasn’t ready for this.  I told him no and that he should just sleep in mommy’s room for tonight.  And then he cried and said “but mom, it’s my room!” 

There’s still a lot to do in there and I’m using that excuse as to why he can’t sleep in there yet.  I know, I’m so mean.  But there really is a lot more to do.  I can’t fit both of their beds in there so I’m still trying to figure that out.  The bed that is currently in there is a water bed and I’m not up to moving it myself.  And besides, I haven’t figured out where to put it because this house has too much furniture. 

I need closet doors.  I need storage and décor ideas.  They’ve never had their own space before and I want it to reflect them.  Am I being weird and over the top? 

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this set up would be cute if I could fit 2 beds
Anyway, I’m still searching décor and storage ideas and I’ll let y’all know my progress…if I ever make any!  I’ll get over my attachment issues soon.  I think once their room is done and I’m happy with it, I’ll be more open to letting them sleep in there.  Maybe….

Are there any other moms out there who went through this or something similar?  Is it just me who had their kids sleep in my room since birth?  I’m thinking that I wouldn’t have these issues if they had their own room from the very beginning.  Anyway, feel free to give me any ideas or advice or if you feel the need to yell at me and tell me to get over my attachment issues, that’ll do too. 

To be continued…

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Happy Momma's Day!

I know.  I’ve been quiet but I just wanted to pop in really quick to say Happy Momma's Day to all the mommas out there!  I hope your day is just as wonderful and special as you are.

I also wanted to say Happy Momma's Day to my mom!  Thank you for always being there for me, for all the advice, for all the times you lend me your ear to vent and then reminding me to look at the big picture.  Thank you for raising me with the morals and values that I have with me today; values and morals that I’m instilling in my own Radicals.  Thank you for being the glue that holds our family together.  I am who am I am today because of you.  I love you to the moon and back!


Friday, May 4, 2012


Happy Friday to you, friends!  Before you all roll your eyes at me because I said I was going to post my project and didn’t, know this: the reality of that project hit me and I’m not too thrilled with it anymore.  But I will post it later, nonetheless. 

And, I’ve been an emotional wreck all week.  I have the rash to prove it. 

I have been given the opportunity of a life time.  For me, an opportunity where there is no second chances.  It’s either I do it now or forever hold my peace. 

I was invited to participate in next year’s Merrie Monarch…the Olympics of Hula.  Haha, I read that somewhere but I don’t remember where.  This is big.  I haven’t danced in over 10 years and my Kumu called to say that he’s holding a spot for me if I want it.  What the what?  Heck yes I want it! 

What’s the catch?  Kumu is in Kona.  2.5 hours away. 

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If I didn’t have children, I’d make this decision in a heartbeat but since I do have children, it ain’t so easy.  So now the question becomes how am I going to do this. 

I spent all week going back and forth with the Mister trying to come up with some kind of plan to make this work.  But all plans involve separating my family for a year.  Am I willing to make that sacrifice?  I have mixed emotions. 

Doing this will involve the Radicals and I living in Kona for one half of the week and coming back to Hilo for the other half.  That’s a lot of driving every week for a whole year.  That’s a lot of time spent away from the Mister.  That kind of jacks up my rotation.  I have school and work to think about.  I have my Radicals to think about.  I told the Mister that I’m going to need his support, mentally and emotionally, if I do this because being separated (and all the darn driving!) is eventually going to take its toll.  I don’t want to be half way through this and all of a sudden one of us can’t handle it.  This is a big commitment. 

Another question is how is this going to affect the Radicals?  Will they be okay with their routine being messed up?  Will they be okay away from the Mister for half the week?  Will all the driving make them crazy?  With Radical #1 starting pre-school this year, how am I going to do this?  The Mister suggested that he stay here while me and Radical #2 go to Kona.  Yeah…no.  The Radicals are always together.  How will being apart affect them?  How will it affect me?  I always have both the Radicals with me and I’ve never spent a night away from them. 

I asked if we could move to Kona for a year.  He knows we can trade places; I can work and he can be a SAHD but then there’s this house.  What do we do about this house?  Sometimes (like now) the obligation we have to this house is overwhelming. 

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In the end, I’m asking myself would this be worth it.  Am I okay with turning my family’s world upside down for an opportunity that only benefits me?  Am I going to regret not doing it and am I going to sing the shoulda-coulda-woulda-but didn’t song? 

Gosh darn, lots to think about.  Decisions…decisions…being a grownup is hard. 

Anyone have any advice, thoughts, or suggestions.  Anything?

Have a great weekend!